Learning your love language

Updated: Jun 6, 2020

Love Languages and How We Must Learn Them to Learn To Love Ourselves

Quality time

It is important for people to give themselves quality time for mindful practice such as progressive muscle relaxation, deep breathing, and meditation. These practices help an individual to connect with oneself. It is also important for people to celebrate the gift of life by making time for leisure and hobbies (Nichols et al., 2018).

Physical touch

It involves stretching of muscles or giving oneself massage, which makes one relax into his or her body. One can also soak in love and release stress and toxins by taking a hot bath with Epsom salts. Moisturize the skin with oils and lotions while thanking every part of the body for the service one receives (Nichols et al., 2018).

Acts of service

It is offering services to the spouse, close family members, or community. It can also involve creating a clean and well-organized home environment, which is aesthetically pleasing (Nichols et al., 2018). This is important because it makes one love where he or she is staying. It should be accompanied by healthy meals.

Words of affirmation

Since the thought precedes the behavior and emotions, it is important for people to practice daily affirmations. It can be through reciting mantras that boost self-compassion that is meant to bring the attention of being good to oneself (Taylor, 2018). It is also necessary that one ensures that self-talk is always positive.

Gift giving

People should learn this love language by buying things they love. They should not allow things at home that do not bring positive vibrations in their life. People are also encouraged to invest in themselves through education and advancement (Taylor, 2018).


Nichols, A., Riffe, J., Kaczor, C., Cook, A., Crum, G., Hoover, A., & Smith, R. (2018). The Five Love Languages Program: An Exploratory Investigation Points to Improvements in Relationship Functioning. Journal of Human Sciences and Extension, 6(3).

Taylor, S. R. (2018). The body is not an apology: The power of radical self-love. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.

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